Back To December
by GhostWhispererJimel
Summary: Brooke Davis has been living in New York for the last four years, developing her company. But when she runs into old flame Lucas Scott, she can't help but wonder if she likes the life she's living. Will she let him get away when he has to leave for the airport, or will she admit her feelings that she has been keeping inside all these years?


**Author's note: Hey guys! It's good to be back! Even though I never really left. Anyway, before everyone gets all worked up, I'm still taking a break from Fanfiction to work on my Brucas sequel. Hopefully I will have a chapter up and running for all of you soon, but in the meantime, I thought you all might like this. It's a one-shot I did of Brucas a while back to audition for an RP on tumblr. (I didn't get it. Boo-hoo to them.) And anyway, I really like the way this turned out. I did a little tweaking on it, since it was written a while ago, but I didn't change much. Just so you all know, again, this was written a while ago, so I haven't done any new writing since "Something's Gotta Give" which I promised I wouldn't do. I just thought that maybe you all would appreciate something new from me. This story is absolutely the cheesiest thing I've ever done, but I hope all you BLers enjoy it anyway. I guess BLers like cheesy, so it works in my favor. Anyway, this is a one-shot, and it's called "Back To December", yes, by the popular song. I actually based the entire story around the song, so if you don't know it(shame on you), go listen to it. All of the lyrics are in italicized bold and gives you a preview of what that part of the story will be about. I don't know if any of my readers from "Something's Gotta Give" are reading this, but if you are, it is TOTALLY different from that story, so be prepared. Anyway, this is the one-shot. All of the flashbacks are in italics, and some of them are a little jumbled up, but I don't think you'll get confused as long as you read the lyric that goes with it. Anyway, let me know what you think. I've gotta start writing more BJu stuff or you guys are going to fully corrupt me before I graduate high school.**

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_**-I'm so glad you made time to see me. How's life? Tell me how's your family. I haven't seen them in a while. You've been good, busier than ever. We small talk, work and the weather. Your guard is up and I know why...-**_

Brooke Penelope Davis steps out of Macy's with a bright glowing smile on her face. "Here we go, Brooke Davis." She walks to the curb and tries to call for a taxi. Being in New York City hasn't been easy for Brooke to get used to, but it's where she really wants to be. She has spent the last four years in New York with her mom, trying to learn how to run her own business, and after four years, it was finally all hers. She just landed a corporate deal with Macy's and felt this is the day she is going to make her mark in the world. "Taxi! Taxi!" Her luck is suddenly changes. "Guess I'll walk." She sighs, having not been able to get a cab for herself. Her phone goes off in her purse and she tries to dig for it as she walks past crowds of people down the street. Not looking where she is going, she rams right into another person. She falls flat on her backside while the person in front of her barely flinches. "Ugh! What the hell?" Brooke shouts, upset that her outfit is dirty now.

"Oh! Sorry!" The voice says. "Let me help you." The stranger reaches a hand down to help her up.

"I don't _need_ your help!" She says, taking the man's hand anyway. She brushes herself off and gets ready to chew the guy out. "Listen here, mister, I-" She looks up and locks eyes with the man immediately, stunned by who is standing before her. "... Lucas..."

"Brooke...? Hi." Lucas smiles.

"Hi..." She whispers in disbelief. "Wh... what are you doing in New York?"

"It's the first leg of my book tour. New York's a big market. And you?"

"I-I've been living here with my mom... four years."

"You didn't go to college?"

"No... Did you?"

"Yeah. I studied Language and Literature."

"Wow... College graduate. I'm proud of you."

"Well, you too. I-I heard about Clothes Over Bro's... it's pretty exciting for you."

"Yeah it is." She smiles. "So, you're in town for a while?"

"Actually, I was... I'm heading to the airport... tonight."

"Oh..."

"Sorry, I... I wish I knew you were here. I would've spent some time with you."

"Well, it's kinda my fault that you didn't know I was here... I mean, we haven't spoken in four years..."

"Yeah..."

"But... how are you Luke?"

"I'm doing okay. I mean, I could be better. My girlfriend left me, so..."

"Aw, things didn't work out with you and Peyton?"

"No, not Peyton... Peyton and I- we didn't last very long. Her name was Lindsey."

"Oh, I'm sorry Luke."

"It's okay. But you look like you're doing pretty good for yourself, huh?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm... I'm doing great." She feigns a smile.

"Good, good. Well, listen, I gotta get back to my hotel so, I'll see you." He starts walking away with a sad look on his face.

"Lucas, you could... you could stay with me if you want. Just for tonight?"

"I'd love to... but I can't. Sorry." Lucas frowns and turns back around to walk away. "It was nice to see you again, Brooke." He says while walking past a crowd of people like a shadow. Brooke stares in the direction that Lucas left, letting people bump into her. What went wrong with them?

_-__**Because the last time you saw me is still burned in the back of your mind. You gave me roses and I left them there to die.-**_

_"What are we doing Lucas?" Brooke asked. _

_Lucas was confused. "I don't know what you mean."  
_

_"Are we doing anything serious? Because if you want us to be together... you can't be crushing out on Peyton."_

_"I'm not crushing out."_

_"Don't lie to me Lucas. It's as plain as the squint on your face... Do you love her?"_

_"No." He replied immediately. "I love you."_

_"Well, you have a funny way of showing it."_

_"That's not fair. Peyton's my friend, I-I'm sorry if you think it's more than that."_

_"Well, it definitely looks like that."_

_"Brooke, you gotta know... I would never ever cheat on you. Even if I did have feelings for Peyton, I would never cheat on you to be with her. I'm not cheating on you."_

_"See... that part I can believe. But I don't understand what your relationship is with her. You spend all of your time with her, Luke. I feel like I've been taking a backseat in this relationship and I don't like it."_

_"I'm sorry."_

_"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I'm acting like the jealous, selfish girlfriend... but I wanna be selfish with you, Lucas, I do."_

_"Okay, we can do that. We can."_

_"When Lucas? Because I've been waiting. I've been waiting for a long time. And sometimes I just feel like I'm your second priority."_

_"I didn't know you felt this way."_

_"Yeah, and neither did I until I saw how much time you were spending with Peyton."_

_"Look, none of this is about Peyton, Brooke, I promise."_

_"That's just it Luke... I'm tired of hearing your empty promises. I'm done."_

_"Are you breaking up with me?"_

_"... Yeah... I guess I am." She said, swallowing hard. _

_**-So this is me swallowing my pride, Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night," And I go back to December all the time.-**_

Brooke walks into the door of her apartment and sighs, knowing how empty it is. She sets her things down and walks straight into her bedroom. She plops down on her bed and yells out all of her frustration. "God, Lucas, where have you been this whole time?" She asks, to herself. "I miss you..." She lies in her bed, trying not to cry, then all of a sudden gets up to get something from underneath her bed. She pulls out a journal and opens it up, sitting on the floor nearby her bed. She looks inside and reads aloud.

"September 30, 2003: I met someone today. His name is Lucas Scott. He's so hot! But he keeps shutting me out... What do I have to do to get him in my bed?" She shakes her head at her old ignorance and flips a few pages ahead.

"October 11, 2003: I think I'm falling for Lucas. He's definitely not like the rest of them... We'll see..." She smiles and flips ahead again.

"December 3, 2003: Lucas and I are finally together! Dreams really do come true... I think he might be the one for me." Brooke's voice starts breaking, thinking about the times they had together. She flips ahead much farther.

"March 15, 2004: I LOVE spending time with Lucas. He smart, dignified, and cares about me more than anyone I've ever met. He means the world to me and I don't know what I would do without him. He's definitely the one for me..." Brooke turns through a big chunk of a pages and frowns.

"June 27, 2004: Lucas is spending a lot of time with Peyton. I wish he'd pay more attention to me. But maybe we're just not meant to be." She flips ahead again, not being able to take much more.

"December 11, 2004: Lucas and I broke up... I guess it was for the best... He just doesn't love me anymore..." She turns to the next page in her journal, which is a blank page. She takes out a pen and starts writing.

_**-It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you. Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine. I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right. I go back to December all the time.-**_

"Decmber 11, 2008: Fate has a funny way of getting to you. I ran into Lucas today... exactly four days since we broke up. I miss Lucas more than anything... I want him back... and I'm going to get him."

_**-These days I haven't been sleeping, Staying up, playing back myself leavin'. When your birthday passed and I didn't call.-**_

Brooke puts her journal away and starts looking through old photos of her and Lucas. She can't bare the thought of being without him any longer. They used to be so good for each other before things went south. Now any time she looked at him, she got angry. Not at him though. She was angry at the thought of what she gave up.

_**-And I think about summer, all the beautiful times, I watched you laughing from the passenger side. Realized that I loved you in the fall.-**_

_"Lucas! What are you doing?" Brooke giggled, with Lucas holding his hands over her eyes._

_"It's a secret." He whispered in her ear. "Okay, open!" He said, moving his hands from her face. She stared dead ahead at brand new car- one that Brooke had been dying to get._

_"Dude, you got me a car?" She smiled wide._

_"Yeah. I wanted to do something nice for you."_

_"Yeah, but a car? Luke, this is too much..."_

_"Are you kidding me? Nothing's too much for my pretty girl." He looked deeply into her eyes before sinking his lips against hers. "Wanna take it for a spin?" He asked, pulling the keys out of his pocket._

_"Hell yes!" She said, snatching the keys from him. "Lucas, this is amazing... Thank you."_

_"You're welcome... I'd do it any day for you... I love you." He said, kissing her on the cheek._

_"You love me?" Brooke said with wet eyes. "That's the first time you've said it."_

_"I know... but I do. I love you Brooke Davis."_

_"Well... I love you too Lucas Scott." She said, exchanging another kiss with him. Summer was the greatest time of year for them._

_**-And then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind You gave me all your love and all I gave you was "Goodbye".-**_

_Lucas knocked on Brooke's door, trying to reason with her. She answered the door and attempted to slam it in his face the second she locked eyes with him. He put his hand up to stop the door from shutting._

_"Brooke, I wanna talk!"_

_"No." She said, trying to shut the door, further._

_"Brooke, this is ridiculous! I don't want you to leave me, okay? I love you."_

_"You say that Lucas, but I'm finding it really hard to believe it."_

_"If you don't believe that, Brooke, then you don't believe in me..." Those words hurt Brooke. She looked at him with sad eyes. "I came here to try and talk with you and maybe convince you to trust me again... but now I'm thinking... I'm thinking that I can't be with someone that would lose faith in me." Brooke looked at him, trying to understand. "I just can't... I can't see myself being with you if we can't be in this one hundred percent... so maybe... maybe this isn't the best thing for us... Maybe we do need some time apart."_

_"Well that works for me..." Brooke said, coldly. "Considering I never want to see you again..." She closed the door in his face, leaving him crushed. He left, never speaking to Brooke again._

_**-So this is me swallowing my pride, standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night." And I go back to December all the time. It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you, Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine. I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind I go back to December all the time.-**_

She takes the photo that is in her hand and throws the whole frame against the wall of her apartment. She digs around for more photos and throws them at the wall, one by one. At this point, she smashes everything in sight, until the pain in her heart has gone away- until it's as broken as she is. But as soon as there's nothing left for her to break, she doesn't know what to do with herself. So she throws her body against the wall as hard as she can until she crashes to the floor. What drove her to be this heartbroken? How could one boy do all of this to her?

_**-I miss your tanned skin, your sweet smile, So good to me, so right And how you held me in your arms that September night - The first time you ever saw me cry.-**_

_Brooke and Lucas laid on the bed together, kissing passionately, not saying a word to one another, until Brooke pulled away._

_"What? What is it?" Lucas asked, unaware of what was wrong._

_"I love you Lucas." She whispered._

_"Well, I love you too... Is that a bad thing?"_

_"No... I... Yes?... I don't know."_

_"Brooke, if something's wrong, you can talk to me, you know that. What's up?"_

_"I don't know if I can do this..." She whispered with tears filling her eyes._

_"Why not?"_

_"Because my heart's telling me to stop."_

_"I don't understand."_

_"Lucas... I've been with a lot of guys before... and I've had sex with a lot of them... But... I've never actually made love before. And... my heart's beating really fast and I think it's trying to tell me that I'm not ready."_

_"You're not ready to sleep with me, or you're not ready to be in love with me?"_

_"Both? I think I love you Lucas... like more than anything... But if I do and we do this... I couldn't handle it if we didn't make it to the end of this finish line. I couldn't do it." Lucas looked at Brooke with a glimmer in his eyes. He grabbed her hand and held it tightly._

_"We will, Brooke... If there's one thing I know, it's that we'll make it to the end. I promise."_

_"You do?"_

_"Yeah. I'd never leave you Brooke. Never."_

_"I'm just really scared." She said, with a tear rolling down her cheek._

_"Don't be... I'm gonna take care of you Brooke. There's no need to be scared." Lucas looked down and saw that her hands were shaking. "It's gonna be okay." Brooke smiled, nodded her head and kissed Lucas again. That night was the first time they had slept together, and it was the moment that Brooke had really fallen in love._

_**-Maybe this is wishful thinking, Probably mindless dreaming, But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right. I'd go back in time and change it but I can't. So if the chain is on your door I understand.-**_

Brooke is just realizing what a mistake this all has been. She's never wanted anyone else more. She picks up the phone and dials a familiar number. She was nuts for doing this. How could she even be sure if it was his number still? She listens to the ringing, and waits for a voice on the other end. All she gets is voicemail. She hangs up the phone and looks at the clock. 8:52... Lucas is heading to the airport.

_**-But this is me swallowing my pride Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night." And I go back to December...- **_

"LUCAS!" Brooke yells, running all around the airport. "LUCAS!" She can't find him anywhere. She looks all over, frantically-desperately trying to find the boy that she loves in case she never sees him again. She spots him by baggage and runs past a dozen people to get to him. "LUCAS!" She shouts, as he starts to walk away. He turns around to see Brooke just as she stops running.

"Brooke?" He asks, confused. "What are you doing here? Are you okay?" He asks, realizing she is out of breath.

"I love you." She says, inbetween gasps.

"What?"

"I love you Luke. I never stopped loving you. But the problem was that I was too stupid and too prideful to admit that I wanted to be with you more than anyone else in the world. I didn't think about what my life was going to be like without you, and I've never been more miserable. But I'm tired of being miserable Luke. I want to be with you. I want to spend my life with you. I want to get married, have kids, and grow old with you. I want everything Luke. I can't imagine letting you walk through those gates and out of my life forever. I can't do that. I need you to be with me. And I'm sorry it's taken me this long to realize it, but I was stupid back then. I wasn't able to see what I had in front of me, and I'm scared that I missed my chance. And I know you'll probably never take me back, but I just needed you to know that I will do anything to have you in my life again... I'm sorry." Brooke looks up at Lucas, tears streaming down her cheeks. Lucas looks as though he doesn't care. He tries to process all that Brooke has said."You hate me, don't you?" She says, saddend. Lucas looks at Brooke, trying not to cry himself. He sets his bags down and puts his hands on Brooke's shoulders.

"Brooke... I don't hate you. But you have to know something... That urgency that you feel... that's how I've felt every day of my life for the last four years. And I've had to hold it in, in hopes that someday you would love me back as much as I loved you. And I'm sorry it's taken you this long to realize it, but I've felt for so long. Most guys would walk away at this point... But I'm not most , I never stopped caring about you. I never stopped loving you. I worried about you every day. And I didn't have the strength to pick up a phone and call because I needed you to have your way. But I think I've waited long enough for you Brooke."

"... So then... I guess that means there's no chance for us?" Lucas turns back to his bag and picks it up. He looks back at Brooke and kisses her on the forehead.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go." Lucas turns back and starts walking towards the gates. Brooke lowers her head, saddened by the thought that she let her one true love slip past her. She starts to cry, but wipes the tears away as they fall. She watches Lucas walk farther and farther away from her. As her approaches the gate, he looks back at Brooke.

"Well?" He says, getting her attention. "You coming or what?"

Brooke looks at Lucas confused. "What?"

"Come on." He chuckles. "Our flight's about to leave." He walks back over to Brooke, realizing she is still confused. He puts his hands on her shoulder again. "Hey..." He whispers. "I'm tired of living my life without you. And I need you back. I love you pretty girl..." He smiles and kisses her ever so lightly on the lips.

"So you still love me?"

"Of course I do. How could I not? Come back home with me Brooke Davis..." He smiles again.

"Lucas, I... I can't just leave! I have a life here."

"But it's not the life you want. Trust me..." He grabs her hand and walks with her to the gate. "Hey, when we get back..." They stop walking and Brooke looks at Lucas, feeling overwhelmed. "... do you wanna get married?"

"What?"

"I think it's time we start living our lives together. What do you say?"

"Luke... we just... I mean, we can't...we..."

"Hey... If you're looking for excuses, you're always going to find them. We only have one life to live Brooke, and I don't want to lose you again. Let's get married, let's have kids, let's... grow old together." He chuckles. "I want all that with you Brooke, and maybe I'm moving too fast but... I don't care. And if you love me the way you say you love me, then why not?" Lucas gets down on one knee and looks up at Brooke. "Will you marry me Brooke Davis?"

She looks down at Lucas with tears in her eyes. "What do you think?" She smiles.

"I think you've made me the happiest man in the world." He smiles back. He stands up to kiss her and then spins Brooke around, feeling better than he had in a long time. They can't believe they are really doing it, but when you have a past like the two of them... how could you not? After all... _'There is a tide in the affairs of men...'_

_**-I go back to December all the time. All the time.-**_

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_****_**Author's Note: Well? Was that absolutely terrible? lol, what do I care? It's Brucas. lmao, just kidding. You guys have been great supporters of me, and after the way I ended "Something's Gotta Give", I think you deserved a cheesy Brucas ending, so I thought I'd post this for you all. I mean, it's only fair since you have to wait so long until the end of my sequel. Let me know what you thought. ;)**


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